Monday, September 29, 2008

The handsome ransom

This breaking news is fresh off the press:
The awsomely handsome one eyed mutt is being held for ransom by the crazy sisters!
According to our source (whom we deem somewhat reliable for a one eyed mutt), he was not dognaped, nor has he gone missing. But somehow, in the last week he has arrived in the clutches of the crazy sisters who now refuse to release him without certain demands being met.

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According to our source, his conditon is horrifing.
He is at their complete mercy…they drag him on long walks where he is not allowed to chase birds, but he himself gets chased frequently by the crazy sisters who insist there's a button to push on his tail...

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....they connive him into precarious kayaks, where he is forced to sit still or reap the consequences....he gets nothing to eat but scrapes and mac and cheese....
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He's forced to play out side amidst unimagineable horrors, while the wolves frolic in the field. AND HE HAS TO SLEEP WITH OUT HIS PILLOW!!!!

These perhaps would not be so bad alone, but to top it all off, the crazy sisters can't seem to refrain from making him play dress up with them

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and this humiliating abuse will go on until the handsome ransom is paid in full.

2 comments:

Jamylou said...

So, tell me the tale of how the "one-eyed mutt" lost his eye.

Newsy said...

First of all we want to clairify that it was an accedent. He got hit by a golf club or ball we don't know what one got him. The eye was ruptured but no bones were broke so the vet just removed they eye and gave him a nice squint.